What is the lifestyle of a college professor like?

My life plan at this point (I'm entering my junior year in physics) is to graduate, go to grad school at a hopefully top-ranked school, get my Master's and Ph.D. there, and then start on research. However, I keep hearing all of these horror stories about grad school and teaching at the college level. I mean, I love physics, I love teaching (can't get enough of tutoring), and I've worked with and run my own research projects and love it, but I don't want my entire life run by my job. I'd like to be able to afford a middle-class house with a middle-class car and a family, and also have time for hobbies and things totally unrelated to physics. Maybe join a bowling league or run for city council. If I want to be uberrich, I recognize I'll need another project like a book deal or major invention, but being rich isn't necessary. Is this possible, or is life in academia the broke, barely surviving, all-consuming spiral of frustration that people make it out to be?

I'm in the same position as you, but about 4 years into grad school in physics instead. I attend a large but not-highly-ranked university with a small but good physics department. My professors all make in the 80k - 150k range with tenure, starting salary for a PhD around 65k and it goes up every year. They all have families, kids, nice houses, and a few cars that run even if they aren't all that new. Plus, you get to travel a lot, and it's all paid for on your grants - travel to conferences, collaborations, and instruments/observatories. Book deals don't make you nearly as much as you'd think.

Yes, there are plenty of grad school horror stories out there. I've got a few of my own. The advice I can give you is don't pick an adviser before knowing if you can get along with them, and STUDY for the qualifying exams - I spent nearly 4 months solid studying for mine the time I finally passed them. Oh, and you've left a post-doctoral position off your list - most universities and colleges will expect you to have done at least one before hiring you as a professor.

Most college professors get paid very well. Even at small schools. But let me tell you from experience, grad school in physics SUCKS! It was worth it, in my opinion, but you're constantly worrying about something. How am I going to pay rent with this crappy stipend? How am I going to do all these homework problems, plus grade some papers and prepare for the class I'm teaching tomorrow, all in the next hour? What on earth is this chapter even about? Am I headed in the right direction with my thesis? Will my thesis be accepted? Geez, how long has it been since i slept? It's constant stress. But once you're done, it's well worth all the weekends of fun that you gave up and all the stress. Now, once that is over, try looking for a professor position at a smaller college or university. They tend to not worry as much about pushing you to do as much research as possible, but encourage you to do what you can. The department head at the school where I did my undergrad was active in the local democratic party and his church, did some volunteer work with the young astronaut program and other middle and high school programs, and showed up for every SPS function we had even though he was not our sponsor. Plus he pretty much got to pick and choose his own research projects, which he also obviously loved doing. He was an amazing teacher, and I will never forget the things I learned in his quantum mechanics class. Anyway, my point is, don't try to get into a position at MIT or Berkeley - go for a smaller state school, and you should be able to do all the things you mentioned in your question.