Am I wasting my time trying to call my self in the outdoor advertising business?

To give a brief background. I think I probably need something but I don't know exactly what that is.
I graduated from high school in 1972. The only thing that I really enjoyed was Shop or Industrial arts class. i was scared of everyone in High School. Went to college off and on 3 or 4 times in 3 or 4 different schools. I went into paint contracting business in 1974 or there about. I wish that I had a more accurate chronological history of my life and career but i will try to piece things together as best as I can. I am asking this question without my wife's knowledge. We have 2 children age 13,girl, and age 15,boy.

To make a long story short: I have struggled in outdoor ad business since 1995. This was also during the time I probably had a nervous breakdown and ended up hospitalized for fighting with my neighbors. My neighbor are my wife and my friiends whom we are still good friends with. They are our Christian Friends. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.

It sounds like you have always sought to be someone more than you could be. That's really a good attribute to have. Too many people are just smart enough and just lazy enough to land a mediocre job when they are young and settle for a mediocre life. I don't think that you wanted to settle for that.

You are now at an age where you can analyze your strong and weak points and decide what field you could work in that gives you some satisfaction and a feeling of accomplishment while also putting bread on the table.

I would suggest that you think about finding a niche where you work alone and allow your creativity to come to the forefront. From the little that you have told me about your life, I deduce that your personal attributes may restrict your success as a contractor or a front man for a business.

I think that you need to attempt to find a partner in the advertising business or other enterprise who would take care of the mundane business aspects, like interfacing with the public, negotiating contracts and running the everyday business operations while you support the creative side of the enterprise and also implement the ideas in the field.

I think that you need to channel your energy into a specific endeavor which allows you to feel that you are contributing to the overall effort but don't have to be overburdened by other aspects.