Should I pay for the whole bridal shower?!?

I am a bridesmaid in my best friends wedding. The MOH is her younger sister (20 yrs old). I volunteered to organize her bridal shower because it seemed like no-one else was going to do it and I would obviously do anything for her. There are 3 other girls in the wedding party besides me and no-one is really willing to pay for anything. I am a successful business woman but I'm not rolling in dough. I could afford to foot the entire bill but should I really have to? I have made sure to run every last detail by the MOH but is that something that I really have to do as well, considering she's not paying for anything and I have done weeks of planning? I would do anything in the world for my best friend and if it means paying for the whole thing then so be it. I just kind of feel taken advantage of by everyone else. Also, should I let it be known on the invites that it was all me or should I still write that the shower was hosted by "the bridesmaids". PLEASE HELP!!!!

If you volunteered to organize the shower without clearly stating that you expected some help in paying for it, then you may just end up footing the entire bill. The maid of honor is too young and/or too inexperienced to understand that it's supposed to be her responsibility to help host the shower (and by host, I mean organize AND pay for it). You might want to consider "delegating" some of the duties, and thereby some of the cost. For example, ask one of the bridesmaids if she would be able to take care of the favors and centerpieces, ask another to get the plates, napkins, cups, etc., and another if they could take care of the cake. Make it clear that you are asking them to select and pay for whatever you are asking them to "take care of".

Unless this is a surprise shower, the bride probably already knows you are the person doing all the planning and paying for everything, so I don't think you should send out the invites from just you. As frustrating as it is, try to take the high road and state that it's hosted by all bridesmaids. If you don't, and the bride's sister starts complaining to her, then it's just going to cause undue stress for your friend. The last thing a bride needs is her attendants sniping about each other behind the other's back.

Even though it feels like you're being taken advantage of, I don't think anyone is doing so intentionally. It sounds like everyone in her bridal party is young and doesn't really know what their responsibilities are. Just remember that you are doing it for your friend.

I recently had a friend who was a maid of honor, and her older sister (not in the wedding but invited) ended up planning and paying for the whole shower/bachelorette party. She opted that, that was the wedding gift to the bride/groom. If you would normally by something for the shower, you could always opt that throwing the party was your gift. Afterall they prbably would not have gotten as many things, etc if you had not had the party.

All of the bridesmaids are expected to chip in. However if no one else is willing to pay, then pay for it yourself within your means. The bride does deserve a shower even if no one else can be bothered to give her one. It is sad that no one else cares enough to help but what can you do? You can't force them to participate if they don't want to.

I have never once seen any shower invites that listed who the hostesses are. So I wouldn't worry about giving the other girls credit when they didn't do anything to help out.

I think that you should sit down with all the bridesmaids and state your position. You are all her friends, and you all want to give the bride a nice party - but not only you should have to pay. Maybe you can't all divide things up equally (because some of the party is younger/maybe students) but you could all contribute what you can and what is fair.

I hope it works out!

maybe you could try organizing a meeting of all the bridesmaids to discuss the shower. That way everyone feels included and may be more apt to help pitch in. All the weddings I have been in all the bridesmaids took part in the payment and planning. You could delegate something for each one to do like one bring drinks, food, decorations, etc. You could also suggest that you all go in together to buy one of the BIG items on her registry. Good luck and hope this helps.

I'm surprised that the other girls are not paying for anything,some friends! and her sister not,very rude. Since they aren't helping you at all go ahead and exclude their names from the invitation, I believe she should have made you her maid of honor. You are a true friend. I hope she realizes this. The hosts name is always on the invitation.

If you're hosting a party (called a bridal shower) then host a party. Don't collect money to fund your party and don't relay the details of your party through someone else. Issue the invitations in your name.

You aren't being taken advantage of because as you say, you volunteered.

you need to ask for help. you should not be paying for this. the young sister needs to help out money wise. and maybe even her mom could chip in. and definitely the other 3 girls in the wedding party. you need to ask for money.

Have you asked anyone to help or just been doing things on your own and wondering why nobody is offering to help pay? I would talk with the other bridesmaids and the MOH and ask them to help pay for it. If they don't, then yes by all means pay for it for your friend to be able to have a shower. It may be on a smaller scale, but still nice. If they choose not to help, then no don't list them as the hostesses. You deserve the credit in that case, don't give it away to those who don't deserve it.

No this should not be your whole responsibility. I recommend you organize it at a local restaurant where you can have a private room and a reservation, but you dont have to pay for the room ( I know Spaghetti Warehouse And each individual can pay their own food. You can bring a cake, which you can purchase. And you can pay for the brides meal. This is perfectly acceptable. I do not think you should have to foot the bill and if the other girls do not want to give you some money for it, it can still be your responsibility and you get the credit for everything, but you dont have to pay for EVERYTHING. Go get a page of balloons and some table confetti and minimal decorations so it is still nice for your best friend, but do not pay for it all. If you do the invites just say RSVP to you. And do not include anyone elses name but dont say anything like "organized by ___" (you) that is not necessary. I hope this helps. I was not in this same situation, but I was the bride with the MOH that didnt want to do anything (not even pay for her dress) so I know what its like and this is the way to still do something but not make the other people fell uncomfortable. Good Luck!

Apparently you agreed to take on the responsiblity. That was your mistake. Sorry! Next time, get together with the other gals and ask if they want to go in on a shower with you. Decide together how to handle things, what you need and don't need and how much budget everyone can afford. THEN, and only then, plan the shower together.

You're taken on the responsibility, planned it on your own and now you can't expect others to "chip in" money. The shower invitation should have your name on it as the solo hostess since it's being done by you.

OR, you can try to "salvage" things and ask the other gals if they want to be a part of the shower. Let them be responsible for something if they wish. Or, if they agree and ask how much it would cost, divide it evenly and be honest. Best of luck~~