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What should I say when someone asks me a nosy, personal question?


I'm (a very mature) 30 year old but look about 25 and my spouse is 50. We have a great marriage and age doesn't make any difference. Occasionally, people I hardly know will ask me "Did you parents have a problem with you marrying someone so much older?". I find this question to be insulting, personal and frankly odd since it's not as though I'm 16. If it's someone whom I do not need to get along with then I have no problem telling them it is none of their business but recently we hosted a dinner party and the wife of my husband's coworker asked me this at the table. I don't want to be confrontational since our husbands work together. I'm just curious if anyone has a creative reply I could say that lets the person know that it is an inappropriate question without seeming belligerent? Thanks!

I know that could be difficult for you. In situations like that I agree to reversing it slightly by asking "why do you ask?" in a 'so-called' nice way, and you'd be surprised the response you'd get!
And if that gets you no where, you can say that you love him and that's why!

how about , " no my parents didnt have any say. im an adult they know i make my own decisoins. i dont need to justify it " then your not directing it directly at her but your nicely letting her know your point.
no need to say it snotty just say it nice. she will still get the clue and appreciate that you were so nice about it .

if u dont want to answer it. tell them u dont get into ya personal business.

well if they dont have an respect for u making up ur own mind about who u love why should u respect them?
just tell them its not their business.
some people are too ignorant to even notice the sutle hint that they were being rude!

Say...

"Why would you ask such a personal question?"

The secret in doing this is being able to cop a totally inquisitive tone of voice when you ask the quesiton.............don't sound irritated or mad.........sound inquisitive......and look right them in the eye portraying that you are waiting on their answer.

ask her what the age difference is between her and her husband ,or you could just tell her you find that question to be very inappropriate .

just tell them you met the height and age requirements for this ride.

When I am asked a personal question simply saying, "I don't see how that is any concern of yours." or "That is a personal question that I would rather not answer." usually shuts people up. It's polite and usually the person will apologize for offending you.

Hope I helped. :-)

It's just an invasive tacky question. I usually handle those by turning them around. In this case I might respond, "That's curious, why do ask?" It forces them to think about just how invasive the question is without you actually having to be rude about it.

You could also respond by telling them that your parents are wise enough to realize that love doesn't concern itself with age.

Whatever you opt to answer, take solace in the fact that you have a solid marriage AND manners!

I have the same problem sometimes. My husband is 10 years younger than me, and people make smart remarks like "you robbed the cradle!", and "hey, when he was riding a bike, you were getting your drivers license". I just laugh and say." You know, age is just a number, and has no relevance in our loving marriage!"

tell them to my there own bee wax ,,, and smile

How about simply.. "I feel that your question is a bit too personal for my taste..and I don't wish to discuss my personal life with you or anyone else for that matter." Then casually move on to another topic. Who you marry, their age, and the personal opinion of your family is no body's business but yours. If you don't care to discuss it with anyone .. simply state that. Some folks are just too nosey for their own good. =)

Walk up to their partner and say, "Did your parents have a problem with you marrying someone so nosy?"


or


"My parents taught me not to care what other people think."

Life is an adventure, we find our strength in our differences and comfort in our similarities.

As for the wife at the dinner party, it was no ones business.. just say you love your spouse and were married and that your spending the rest of your life with this person, this person makes your life complete and that your happy. This person has no taste to ask you that... and I have never heard so many rude folks that you two are coming across. Call em haters.

I was married to a man 25 years older than me, and often got that type of question as well. I simply used to say "No, why would they, they didn't marry him, I did!". I have never understood why people think it is okay to ask the wife those kind of questions, but they never seem to ask the man what people had to say about him marrying someone so much younger. It is almost as if we have done a shocking thing, but he gets all the pats on the back, as if he was so clever to have found such a young wife!

"no, in fact, they were all for it. I see it gives you problems...were you interested in my husband before he met me?"

Just tell them, I Love a man with experience and the rest of you have a long way to go!!!

I'm sorry. people can be very insensitive sometimes. I can only imagine how you must have felt.
if someone asks that question again, and you feel obligated to give them some sort of answer, just reply with a simple, "my parents adore my husband. and so do I." smile, and change the subject, or just don't offer any more information. I think that would be polite, yet reserved enough to let them know that age is not a topic for discussion.

my uncle was 18 years older than my aunt and they had a wonderful marriage. he passed away several years ago with my aunt by his side.
age is only a number. it is not what determines a great marriage.
Best Wishes To You and Your Husband.

how about something witty like this," I love older men much like how I enjoy fine wine or cheese. Aged to perfection.'' And give em a big grin. act in a way that no one would expect. It's really none of their business, just remember the importance of a great sense of humor you can't get through life without one! oh and one more thing tell the person that your husband gets along great with your parents and then ask the person how is your relationship with your in-laws! good luck!

The best way to not amswer their question is to come back with a question like" Why would you ask that?"

I'd say no, did your parents have trouble with you marrying outside your species?

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